After completing a Somatic Plant Medicine Integration certification over the past year, I met with the trainer, a somatic practitioner, to help understand what I was noticing and prepare myself for the journey. During the preparation session, I felt fear and anxiety in my body as well as resilience and a feeling of internal fire. Sitting with the dialectic of fear and not being in control as well as strength and faith in myself helped to steady myself inwardly before the training.
In the following week, I journaled about this part of myself and narrowed down my intentions for the training week and my psilocybin journey. I also paid attention to the pieces that bubbled up in my preparation session. The somatic practitioner encouraged me to be gentle with myself and to slow down in the days ahead. For a few minutes each morning of the week before the training, I sat in stillness and allowed my thoughts to float by without judgment.
In the spirit of allowing things to move through me, I asked a friend for a Reiki session where I became aware of something stuck in my lower abdomen that didn’t want to budge. My friend felt it resist any movement. In my chest and heart area, I experienced a lifting of physical weight and a feeling of pain and discomfort that moved through me as I acknowledged and let go of grief and sadness.
Other than packing the essentials and preparing for weather, I spent the last couple of days before the training aware of what was coming, what I was inviting. I felt a mix of restlessness, hopefulness, and anticipation.
Knowing what I was asking for and unsure if I would be able to access it…
Being around strangers bound up in a similar journey…
Space to exist and be, both internally and outside in nature…
Off I go!
